Boomer’s All-Stars

Frowirth

Back in the 80’s & 90’s, when ESPN was still watchable, Chris Berman made baseball fans laugh with his sports nicknames. At one point, “Boomer” (Berman’s nickname) was told by one of the network’s producers that he wouldn’t be allowed to use the nicknames the following season. While attending the World Series, Berman mentioned the new policy to a few writers and ballplayers. ESPN was then deluged with negative comments from MLB insiders with Hall of Famer George Brett leading the protest. The policy was rescinded very quickly…no one knows what happened to that producer.

 

To pass some time during the Hot Stove season, let’s look back on some of the best from Boomer and include a tidbit or two on the player.

 

> Eddie, Eat, Drink and Be Murray – The Hall of Fame 1B had his rookie card in the 1978 Topps set.

 

> Scott Supercalifragilisticexpiala Brosius – Was the 1998 World Series MVP with the Yankees.

 

> Carlos One if by Land, Two if Baerga – Made four All-Star teams with the Indians.

 

> Bernard Innocent Until Proven Gilkey – His 1996 season with the Mets produced 30 HR’s, a .955 OPS and a 8.1 WAR.

 

> Steve Poison Avery – Was 18-6 with the Braves in 1993 and made the All-Star team.

 

> Miguel Tejada They Come, Tejada They Fall – Won the AL MVP with the A’s in 2002.

 

> Carlos Daylight Come and Delgado Go Home – Long before the NFL issue, he protested the wars in Iraq & Afghanistan by not standing for “God Bless America”.

 

> Jay Ferris Buhner – Hit 40 or more HR’s in three consecutive seasons with the Mariners.

 

> Harold Growing Baines – Inducted into the Hall of Fame in 2019.

 

> David Supreme Court Justice – Forget the 300+ HR’s, he was once married to Halle Berry.

 

> Bert Be Home Blyleven – Hall of Fame Pitcher with 287 Wins.

 

> Jermaine Live And Let Dye – 2005 World Series MVP with the White Sox.

 

> Dave No Man is an Eiland – Has been a major league pitching coach for the Yankees, Royals & Mets.

 

> Albert Winnie the Pujols – 656 HR’s and counting.

 

> Sammy Say it Ain’t Sosa – If you saw him now, you’d understand how ironic this is.

 

> Todd Which Hand Does He Frohwirth – My personal favorite.

 

> LaMarr Where Does it Hoyt – Won a Cy Young Award but also got arrested for trying to bring drugs across the border from Mexico.

 

> Tom Cotton Candiotti – A knuckleballer, he played Hoyt Wilhelm in the movie “61”.

 

> Bobby Bad To the Bonilla – The most overpaid player in history, he still gets $1 Million from the Mets every Summer.

 

> Ozzie Like A Virgil – His dad was a major league player before Madonna was born.

 

> John I Am Not a Kruk – Had a testicle removed during the off-season and came to Spring Training wearing a T-shirt that said, “If they don’t let me play, I’ll take my ball and go home”.

 

> Brook Jacoby Wan Kenobi – His 32 HR’s in 1987 helped me win my first Fantasy Baseball championship.

 

> Jim Home Sweet Thome – The 612 HR’s punched his ticket to Cooperstown.

 

> Hideo Ain’t Gonna Work On Maggie’s Farm Nomo – Pitched the only no-hitter at Coors Field in Denver.

 

> Damion It Don’t Come Easley – Batted .253 in 17 seasons and made $25 Million.

 

> Nomar Mr. Nice Guy Garciaparra – His name comes from his Father Ramon…Nomar is “Ramon” spelled backwards.

 

> Bruce Eggs Benedict – There’s never been a player named Hollandaise.

 

> Moises Skip To My Alou – Also applies to Felipe, Jesus  & Matty.

 

> Rick See You Later Aguilera – 318 lifetime Saves.

 

> Jeff Brown Paper Bagwell – His actual nickname was “BagPipes”.

 

> Oddibe Young Again McDowell – Debuted in 1985 at age 22…he’s now 57.

 

> Al Cigarette Leiter – Pitched in the “Show” for 19 years.

 

> Roberto Remember the Alomar – 10 Gold Gloves and a plaque in Cooperstown.

 

> Mike Enough Aldrete – Drafted by the Giants out of Stanford University.

 

> Jim Hey Abbott – Who’s on first?

 

> Kevin Small Mouth Bass – 14 seasons in the majors, 10 with the Astros.

 

> Hubie Babbling Brooks – Won the Silver Slugger Award in 1985 & 1986 as the best hitting SS.

 

> John Charcoal Burkett – Won 166 Games and was also a professional bowler.

 

> Donald Duck Drooker – Your humble scribe.

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